Pokemon Red, White and Blue

Good evening, now I was recently sitting at my computer, surfing online whilst dipping puppies in acid when I found Peta's newest video game abortion. Yes Peta the company who spends more time... oh I'm sorry, not company, I mean organisation who spends more time making shitty video game parodies including Mario TWICE, cooking mama and Pokemon and once again pokemon is in the firing range with this.

Yes, the company that made PETA porn brings us a new pokemon parody, so what's going on, I wonder?

What? just a second. Yes hi there have I reached McDonald's management., Hi there, do you happen to make your beef burgers out of Miltank?

Well, there we have it, Pokemon, as much as I wish otherwise, ARE NOT FUCKING REAL! Sweet Jesus. So the game begins as Pikachu saves a miltank from the evil mcdonalds and once they do that they find a treasure chest with a video of McDonald's animal cruelty. Don't think I'm going to make a joke about that, animal cruelty is wrong, I agree with that, but bare with me. Next up Pikachu and Miltank fight a mcdonald's customer and then 'rescue' his jigglypuff. Oh and I forgot, Mcdonald's is using Pikachu's face without his permission to sell their Miltank burgers. 

So what next, well, they next save the rare pokemon Grimace from it's captors.

Whilst doing this you unlock a wallpaper, cause you are going to put this as your wallpaper.

As well as your own set of Peta Pokemon cards, aren't they just wonderful, you're doing a fine job here Peta, saving all those Pokemon from becoming burgers.

And the game comes to an end as you take on the evil mastermind of Mcdonald's Ronald himself. Um, just a second, Ronald, did you attack a bunch of Pokemon the other day?

Whoa, intense dude. Anyway, once you beat Ronald you're given this gem of an ending.

Okay Peta low blow, yes Pokemon does re-release crap with small changes, hence why I'm not really a fan of those third versions they make, including yellow.

Oh get over it. But ultimately the truth of this game is to milk Pokemon's popularity. For example, Peta once stated that Mario skinned a Tanooki to get his suit, despite the fact that he gets it from a leaf. But here's a question, did this come up when Mario 3 came out,no, so when did it, oh when the newest mario game of the time came out Super Mario 3d land. And when did the first Pokemon parody come out. The same time as Black and White 2. Hmm.... could it be that Peta is just doing this crap for attention. So you wanna know why I call them a business instead of an organisation. Well maybe it's cause more money goes into this crap and the boss' pocket than into the actual 'charity'. Records show Peta killed a staggering 89.4 percent of the adoptable pets in its care during 2012. Despite years of public outrage over its euthanasia program, the notorious animal rights group has continued killing adoptable dogs and cats at an average of over 30 pets per week. Peta killed 1,647 cats and dogs last year while placing just 19 in adoptive homes. Since 1998, a total of 29,398 pets have died at the hands of Peta workers. So ultimately Peta is more interested than making the green than saving animals and therefore not really an animal charity, but a cold hearted business and this game is furthur proof of that. So here's a question, why doesn't Nintendo sue them for the constant slander. Because it would give them attention and that's what they want, hell nintendo tried to sue them and that went well. Stay the hell away from this game and keep your money away from the real animal slaughters Peta, I'm TheJoelMH, and I'm out!