Ape Escape 2

Ape Escape 2 begins with the now renamed Katie as Natsumi, yes rather than change character names like they did with the original or like the americans did with calling her natalie, we get the japanese names, which makes sense considering the games turning more anime style, and trust me when I go through 3 you’ll know what I’m on about. Anyway… Natsumi and new character Hikaru or if you’re in america, Jimmy, are using a teleporter to get this transport shorts to the monkey park down the road and get this, Jimmy confuses the boxes of pants with the crates holding the damn helmets from Ape Escape, what did nobody label these crates, did he think to check, you leave this idiot running around to sort this. Then again what was the premise of the first game, oh yeah one of the helmets was left lying around the monkey park for Spectre to find so I suppose the professor in charge is the bigger retard considering he left this Jimmy idiot in charge.

And of course the monkeys start their evil plans led by spectre again, and what’s their plans, oh yes run around monuments changing them into monkey versions, well that’s not the full plan, but the secret plan is so dr.evilish it’s hilariously stupid.  But in all honestly this game has no real plot, it’s like they were just… story..fuck it… but for some reason it works, I mean it plays better than the original. So what’s been added, well for starters new villains in the form of the freaky monkey five, who are five super powered monkeys who make up bosses in the games, we have the blue unicycle riding bomber whose room is based on traffic lights, the red kung fu leader, the white mad scientist, the pink popstarlet with psychic powers and yellow monkey. Oh yellow monkey, the most over the top, how can I say it, Gay character I’ve ever seen, you know that stereotype that surrounds gay people, the whole campy thing, yeah that times a thousand.

ANYWAY... Gadget wise, we get all the ones from before, plus, a giant magnet, a water cannon and get this, a bananarang, a boomerang that attracts monkeys. My only question is why this didn’t come up earlier, seriously. But the controls are vertually the same, even the goddamn vehicles drive like shit. The new vehicle included is the robot shaped like a character who I will get to in a minute, and guess what it drives like shit like the rest, why did they make it so goddamn awkward to drive a fucking vehicle, goddamn it!  Seriously I’ve seen better controls on a crane game. There’s also a snowbuggy but as you can guess it also drives like a turd on an ice rink.

And oh yes, the sidekick, a flying baby monkey named, Pipochi, that says it’s own name, which is funny since in america, Natalie is voiced by the same voice artist as misty and Jimmy by the same voice artist behind Ash with a monkey that says it’s own name. Huh no wonder in this game you have to catch them all. Anyway Pipochi basically gives you a free cookie when you run out of health, once in one life, so basically when he’s with you, you have six points of health, now when he’s with you as he spends half the game either back at the lab or captured by the red monkey guy.

So how does it play, well the same as the original but the levels have a lot more variety than the first one and has a generally better feel but the story is nowhere near as good as the original and doesn’t have the battle levels against a rival, so that’s missing, but what does it have butt tons of extras such as clips, artwork, music, all winnable for ten coins in a gashipon mission, god I hate those things as a lot of the time, you win, useless crap such as fortunes that make no sense, yay, can you feel the sarcasm people.

Mini game wise, they’re different, but they suck like the first games mini games, mainly cause Ape Escape mini games always suck which is why Ape Acadamy was an epic failure, here’s a hint sony, bring back Ape Escape as the original gameplay, no mini games and no GODDAMN FUCKING MOTION GAMING!

So I probably better get to the third game next, I guess, but that can wait, Hey Iohel, put on a movie, I need to watch an anime anyway.