The Joel MH: Bioshock Infinite

Well it's game review time, and it's time for some Bioshock Infinite.

What the hell was that? Who the hell are you?

And you are?

Nope, now get out, This is Bioshock Infinite!

Story
It's the year 1912 and Booker De Witt is sent to the flying city of Columbia to recover a girl to pay his debts. The girl in question is Elizabeth, a girl with the power to open tears in the fabric of reality, passing through universes as it were.

So Booker is forced to find a way out of the city with Elizabeth avoiding the songbird, a giant bird creature in armour and the hoards of soldiers under the charge of city founder Comstock as well as a rising rebellion within the city known as the Vox Populi, and a pair of 'siblings' who appear seemingly out of nowhere to give you hints and aid. Oh and the people of Columbia are highly racist, but that's a plot point, trust me on this.

Main Characters

Talking to much about Booker will give away the plot, but the real star is Elizabeth who is sort of an amalgam of the little sisters from the original Bioshock, except she is helpful in a fight drawing on the powers of tears as well as picking up ammo, health and random money lying around to help you out. Oh and here's a very good thing. SHE NEVER GETS IN TROUBLE IN A FUCKING FIGHT, YOU NEVER HAVE TO SAVE HER EXCEPT WHEN THE PLOT REQUIRES IT!

Artwork

The Artwork is glorious, unlike the original it is set up in the sky rather than the bottom of the sea, and the artwork team proves it's not a one trick pony, the sights are glorious, bar the racism of course. Up in Columbia feels like you're up in the clouds and the nice little touches such as the old style viewers in the buildings.

Gameplay

This game is a first-person shooter, but you aren't armed just with machine guns, pistols, shotguns, and the like; you also have vigors. Vigors, like the original BioShock's plasmids, are seemingly magical powers that you can fling at your enemies, ones that are become part of your biology like a Bioshock as it were. You can weaken your enemies by zapping them with a bolt of electricity or by charging into them at impossible speed. or you could use the vigor that everyone uses and replaces the bees from the old games, distracting enemies with crows before gunning them down with your carbine, or flinging them over the edge of a walkway with a shock wave and watching them plummet to their deaths. Of course bees are better, as after 'not the crows' doesn't have the same effect. You may even combine these powers, perhaps setting a foe on fire and then charging into him for an explosive finish, though only 2 are usable quickly, you'll have to swap through a menu to select your quick two. These powers require the use of Salt like the Eve of old.

While many of your foes wield guns or clubs, so are just plain weird but fit the area nicely like plodding George Washington automatons which threaten you with their chainguns, and the best way to bring them down is to aim at the gears that protrude from their backs. The Handymen who look a bit like Big Daddies with no helmet and an obvious heart sticking out are a big menace as they soak up bullets and can cause massive damage to you.

Another addition are the skyrails which allow you to at just a button, ride the railings which link the floating islands that make up the city, which you can shoot from or dive of and slam into an enemies face, weaker enemies dying instantly.

Also you can find powerups for you in the forms of infusions and gear. Infusions can permanently increase health, salt or your shield, yes you have a shield and can only hold two guns, hello Halo, altering FPS's again.

Oh and the Gear, you can hold four types, hats, jackets, pants and boots which you swap on the fly which have aids to your skills, but only one of each is allowed.

The downsides of the game are yes, it has Halo controls which is like forced on the designers these days, it must be like Halo Raaaggghh! The other problem is the last level, I won't spoil it too much, but I will say this, the unfairness is epic, let's throw everything at you including the goddamn kitchen sink which fires minigun rounds at you. But the rest of the game is epically awesome and amazing, buy this game. I give this game a Golden Mew for sure.

So, what are you still doing here, random woman I don't know?

What the hell are you blabbering about?

So, let me get this straight, I died fighting Navi in your verse and hers, I'm a girl, okay I get that, but why are you here? No hold on is everyone reversed in your universe, heard of Halle Berry?